Better

So I found that this morning when walking into the kitchen to make my breakfast that I was walking again, for 4 or 5 steps, without my walking stick on the ground. Obviously it is just an early stage yet but it is MUCH better than they predicted I would be

Well

So I was sitting out at the end of the drive, it was dark, 2 women passed on the other side. I made a comment about their dog and they asked me "Are you OK there" as I s'pose I must have looked like "Some crippled guy sitting in the middle of nowhere"
Bit no I didn't need any help, I brought myself home a few minutes later

Slightly less scared

Next Friday I have to leave the Day Hospital early as I have an appointment with the dentist. Originally I thought "I'd better take my 'chair that day", but on reflection perhaps not...

Scared

I'm going off in 15 minutes without my wheelchair

And it worked. I managed to get in and out of the Taxi on the way there then do "stuff" then get in and out of the ambulance which had a flipping ramp so it was harder - but I managed

And she was getting me to walk with a clearer lift of my right foot and a more definite bang of my right heel. Which felt a bit odd but apparently it looks more realistic when I walk

Freya

Then this evening was worth it when I fed my visiting daughter and generally was just nice

Carol

My case worker came to see me today. And she talked some sense even tho I wasn't able to listen to much etc. She talked about me getting better still and some plans for the future. She also mentioned a Carmarthen society of "get betterers" which I may have to go along to next month and see how it is.

She also talked about me becoming a teacher again which is what I will probably want to do but it feels so scary at present

Walkies with no stick

This morning I walked into the dining room. Moved my 'stick into my right hand in order to do "stuff" with my left. Then I picked up my coffee pot and mug with my left hand, my 'stick was "folded up" in my right as in it wasn't on the ground..... and then I walked from the table into the kitchen, making coffee space, with no stick!!!

AND I was able to do it back later carrying a hot pot of coffee

It broke again

And my alarm bell thingie broke again today. I thought "They said press all 3 buttons" So I pressed all 3 buttons. Still broken. A MOS went and asked the boss and she told him, "Press all 3 buttons for at least 5 seconds" Ahhh, it is all fixed now

Aargh

And someone said that they went to the Motability Office by the railway station in Carmarthen and they saw my new powered 'chair sitting there waiting to be delivered. Aargh, hurry up (/shout)

Walkies

I walked into the kitchen and made breakfast, kept walking 'til I went shopping, came back and walked more until about 2.30 this afternoon

They phoned

And Ethicalsuperstore just phoned me to check some delivery details so hopefully the 12 tubes of Tomato Puree is being delivered this afternoon, to make making Pizza from Naan Bread etc easier

Or this evening....

And I was panicing at 7.35 pm, they already told me they delivered until 8 pm so I was beginning to panic fully, I phoned them up they tried to contact the driver couldn't get hold of him. Just then his van came around the corner, phew

(Sigh)

I'm off to Morrisons in a bit to "get some of this weeks shopping"

And I succeeded. I had asked the Taxi man to come back in an hour and a half but it only took me about 45 minutes to get all my shopping

Sitties

When the kids arrived today I answered the door standing up then got in my wheelchair as apart from that there are only 2 seats at t'table. After they left I was too tired/lazy to stand so I spent the rest of the day wheeling. Tomorrow I will have to take my 'chair shopping but apart from then I should be walking all day

Cool

2 of my kids are on their way over to wish me "Happy Fathers Day" now....

And they were and it was cool, they stayed for 5 or 6 hours, relaxed here as well as visiting, it was just well cool

Well done, Neil

"Today I managed to get my wheelchair forwards all the way up the ramp to my flat. Previously I had to turn around half way and go backwards as it was easier that way, but today I managed it all the way"

The first time in a number of years

(Cheers Chris)

Walkies

Well I have done 7 hours today, I have given up now but who knows how I will feel later

Just WOW, you handsome and clever bugger

And WOW. I got in my taxi (in my 'chair) went into town, did my shopping in Waverly Stores and I was just picking up my shopping when Sam arrived. He pushed me up many hills all over town, we were able to buy all I needed, we stopped and had a coffee then we came back here together. Sam had not been here, it was tidy enough (Phew) and he just thought it suited me. He was being a smidge grown up and told me not to say random stuff to random people which may have actually been what I needed to hear

Sigh #2

Well, as I did so well yesterday I am considering going to the Day Hospital on Wednesday without my wheelchair. I am now pretty sure I can manage but it is just such a scary process, I am attached to my 'chair. Even tho I have not sat in it at all this morning, I won't need to 'til I go out in a Taxi to the Health Food Shop later

But my right hip seems to be aching with all this walking, so "take it easy and take care" then

Nuff walkies

Well at 10pm tonight I sat down in my wheelchair again, that's about 6 and a bit hours walking, I will try to do more tomorrow

I am in town at the HFS and meeting Sam tomorrow, which will involve wheelchair's but afterward's...

BIG Grin

Gosh today's stuff is so important to me, so important

Sigh

Well I am supposed to be walking into physio today but walking is hard as I wore out my left leg on Wednesday ~ it hurts this walking

BUT I tried it and it worked in the end, so I was able to ditch my 'chair when I got there and walked everywhere.

THEN later I went across the road and asked "Did my parcel get delivered here?". They said "Yes" gave it to me, I got back, opened it up, couldn't put it together alone, asked for some help and now it works, my wheelchair is in the hall and I now walk everywhere

Good lord but this cooking while standing up is very hard, but I managed. Lockily I had summat simple on the menu for tonight, it will become more complex as I manage longer and more

Ho hum

Off to the Folk Club that's miles away from here tonight, it's where I used to live

And ho hum but it was an expensive taxi to get me there, but it was excellent when I got there.

Walkies

So a MOS said "Wanna coffee in number 7?", so I said "Yes, I will accompany you" but as I was walking with a MOS I asked her to push my 'chair as I walked along with my 'stick. Which went well but the bit of the road that's tilted to one side really made my right foot turn over that way.

Well, more walkies

So I have just bought a trolley that hopefully will carry my cuppa and meals from the kitchen so I will be able to leave my wheelchair parked in the corner and walk everywhere (Aargh, it is a bit scary but positive)

PHD

Well I went to the Day Hospital for Physio today. It went well and they asked me to ditch my 'chair when I come in on Friday and walk everywhere

Wow

Well I went out tonight, all I can say is WOW. Then tomorrow I am out.....

Playing

Then tonight, after I have cooked for/with Freya her mum is coming to pick her up. She has agreed to give me a lift into town so I can go to the Poetry Night at Caffi Iechyd Da in Jackson's Lane

Walkies

Then this morning I was sat outside doing exercises, when I had finished them I thought "Walkies" and went up hill to the top turned around, got out of my 'chair and walked all the way to the bottom where I turned round and walked back up, past my flat to the top of the hill

Radical

So s'morning I experimented with moving my mouse to my right hand side. It hurt but it worked, so progress. Every day I will do a bit of practice

Weirdness

And this morning outside the shop who came by but Faith from The Abbey. It made me feel a bit better about being in Carmarthen but a bit weirder too

Ho hum....

Well I am bored now, nowt else on today, nowt to do, but Jackie is off tomorrow and I need her to tell me whether Caffi Iechyd Da is accessible

Shopping

Well, as usual on a Monday I went to Morrison's to get my shopping. It was no problem, a passer by pushed me for 2 feet over the step in.

Oops

So I did some washing, then tumble dried it. The tumble drier was playing up, not drying. I emptied the water and looked at where I thought you emptied the dust. Then I asked a MOS. She said "No, this is where you empty the dust"

AND afterwards it still didn't work

So I complained again and this time they showed me, for the first time since I owned a machine that as well as the water and the dust I also need to clean out a filter every month or so

Bed

And I changed my bed this afternoon. I still had to get help with the double duvet cover but I needed a lot less than last time, it was much, much easier

Allen key

And I felt the need to tell someone else that the right hand brake on my 'chair wasn't working properly but this time I chose the right chap. He said "Wait there" and came back with an Allen key mounted in a 'turn it round' thingie and he turned the lock round more with 2 hands and some grunting (as in loads) and it seems fixed now

Walkies (again)

So I just went out the front and walked down and back up behind my 'chair. Then I paused outside and did some more of my exercises. Good lord but these are much easier than they were a few days ago, obviously they are working

F*ck it

Well, I had forgotten it but it happened when I was still able to watch the news. Where else will there be a "big international news stories of the past 10 years" site?

Walkies

And at some point today we came here in their car, I got out walked indoors, put the food we were there for in the fridge, went to the loo and walked back out, got in their car again and went away. It would have been loadsa hassle to free up my 'chair so I just walked. Which felt a bit strange but I managed

Gosh

Well they have gone off now, back to Belfast in't morning. Sad to see them go and pleased and relieved too

Weary

Well I am knackered tonight. We have been busy shopping for all kinds of stuff and just exploring generally. But we found a salad~dryer etc

The Captain

And my sister did send a few pictures of the family visiting Peter on his small schooner when he visited Belfast

Well hello there

And then this afternoon my father appeared with a special surprise for me, which was pleasant. The surprise did give me a book of mine that she had been keeping in care for me for years.

Good oh

Well it went quite well, we were exercising my legs mainly today. For a start I had to just stand on a step with my toes and bend my heels down. This hurt and lasted ages but I wanna get better so...... Then I was on a Stepper doing 200 left/right steps

THEN someone said "Hello Neil" and went off relearning to walk. I had to ask and it was Chris, who used to mend my car many years ago. He had a Brain Hemorrhage randomly or summat. But blinkin flip, I knew someone else there!!!

Tra la la

I am off in a bit....

Nooneraft

Well hello there. Yes, I am a bit excited about the Folk Club tonight but thats not why I am writing this. So.....

Just now I was out the front. I thought about walking behing my 'chair down but then thought "Na, with your 'stick" so a)because I am not sure if I have permission, and b)I was too scared I asked a MOS to push my 'chair behind me. I walked all the way down, turned around and walked back up to my flat before I sat down. Gosh it was scary but I managed

Mornin'

Well good lord, this morning I did the first of my daily exercises while (and after IYSWIM) I was eating my breakfast. Then a scary letter from the tax folk came and someone is now trying to phone them to say "Neil was ill then" so we don't f*c*ing know anything

Impressed

Good golly miss.... So I had to go, with my new keyworker as an accompanient, to the Priory Day Hospital for Physiotherapy today. I was really impressed with it, as I told my worker today just "Thanks for caring about me, thanks for telling the truth".

So next time I shall go alone, now the fear has gone

And I now have 1.5 sheets of paper with my new exercises on which I am to do 3 times daily.

AND part of the reason I am impressed was a woman I was talking to said "My son", I said "How old is he?", she said "21", I said "Good lord, you must have had him when you were 7!!", she laughed and said "No, I was 9" She understood where I was coming from and shot me down, instead of being hurt cos Neil is saying bollox etc

Wow

I was a bit disconcerted by my visit by my daughter. Yes, she was beautiful, she was pleased to see me but my accident was more than half her life ago whereas it seems much more modern to me. Still it was good to see her, good also to cook for her again

Walkies

So today it wasn't raining so I was able to go outside and do that "walk up and down the road until you get better" thing

And again and it's not even lunchtime!! And I went much further this time, from my flat to the bottom, turned around (as before) back up to my flat, past there to the top of the street, turned round again and walked all the way down to my flat

And a third time now, but it was harder so I just walked down and back up the hill, no going past my flat on the way bacck up

Tuesday Bloody Tuesday....

Ho hum, well I am bored now but later my beautiful daughter is coming in and she asked me to cook food for her again. So as long as I make enough for her, she has more than me but she is growing up ATM

World Turned Upside Down

So tonight I was searching for another version of the song to make the layout be better, and I found a new version but it's in a different key, with no "B", it's all stuff that I could play, so I guess I had better practice

Writing file names

And this new version of windows on my new PC doesn't put .htm after web addressed so I need to add it to my "Getting.htm" page, but I will now only add it once, it doesn't need to be in the visible bit

And I have stopped typing .htm in the address bit thingie...

Walkies

So I have permission to walk outside with minimum supervision. Except it is raining today to keep me indoors

Shopping

Well I managed to do most of a weeks shopping in Morrisons(1) today. It all went well, very well, the couple of staff I had to ask to find obscure things were very helpful. All in all it went well

(1) Apparently they bought Safeways 6 or 7 years ago (shrug)

Walkies

So after telling a MOS that I needed her to look at me, I did it, walked from my front door down and back up. Afterwards I spoke to the MOS and she was quite impressed. So now all I have to do is tell a MOS that I am doing it and as long as they check I am not lying in the road in 20 minutes all should be well

Curry Maker

So today I chopped up yesterdays veg to make a Curry. I cooked them, added some lentils. Thought "Oh too runny" added some more lentils. Added more etc. Eventually it was thick enough to eat, and by god but it was delicious too. I tried to make enough for two nights. I succeeded. But as well as tonight's and tomorrow's in the pan I took out and froze 2 more days. Good lord, luckily it is so nice

Sunday Bloody Sunday

Well....

Walk again

Then today after my walk I asked her if it will be possible to do it by myself from tomorrow, she said "Do one with me watching you out the window and we will see how that goes". So after 3.30 tomorrow I will call on her...

Walkies

So today, listening to the MOS who told me to exercise more, but needing help, I buzzed, when a MOS came I wheeled up past the other flat, then turned around and walked to the end of the road and back without a pause. It was the longest walk for some years.....

Rehab

So I was listening to Radio 4, there was a program on about loads of kids who were at war for "The Tigers" in Sri Lanka who after the war folk are concentrating on "the rehabilitation of them". I was in a rehabilitation center too, but I wasn't as....... as them

Waverley Stores

So this morning I was unfaithful to Aardvark, I went to Waverley Stores, around the corner, they sold everything I wanted, fresh organic veg and it was MUCH more accessible than Aardvark, so I might have changed my HFS preferences, while I have movement issues

Walkies

So a woman said to me that I am supposed to be walking more, I said "Too up and down hill" so she said "What about on the road" so today I walked, pushing my 'chair from my flat down to number 7 and back later. The trip back was without someone keeping an eye on me either

Marimba

And a MOS who is from Africa told me that my hangy up thing with bamboo on looked like a small version of a Marimba, a musical instrument

Fix it

And the chap came about to fix my buzzer thing, he just had to reset it and it works again. And I now know how to reset it if it is broken again

Assessment

And the chap came in and assessed me for a new wheelchair and a new electric wheelchair today. Now the electric 'chair isn't powerful enough to take me to town so I will be able to phone a taxi, which makes my sister not panic. So next week he is gonna come back with a larger pushing 'chair and another powered one to try again. But he wasn't able to try footwear for me as the message had kind of only half got thru

And today I was riding in a powered chair which only worked with my right hand. It was too difficult but I was remarkably good

Blinkin' Flip

So there I was exploring stuff on my 'puter, under scanner it had 3 different ways of scanning, I deleted 2 and thought "Fuc* it" and tried it anyway. AND it bleedin' worked!!!

Excited

We are going out later to Llansteffan, to the Folk Club there

And we got there, there was no Folk Club tonight, so she drove to Ferryside had a look, then eventually drove to Llanelli where we found a pub with live music. I joined in a bit with my Kazoo but it was generally VERY good

Sandwiches

So today I was thinking "What shall I have for lunch?" when it occured to me to try cheese and salad creme sandwiches again, which I used to have nearly every day before my brain injury and which I haven't had since, and yes, it was as nice as expected

Fixer

And really early this morning a MOS stuck her head round my door and said "The wheelchair fixer is here - just making sure you are up", then 10 minutes later a man came, changed my tyres and ordered some new brakes for me

And the bleedin' new tyres hurt my hands as I push as they are so tready

A fly

So earlier on today I opened the front door to go outside. While it was open an annoying buzzy fly flew in. I came back in later and the fly was being really audible flying about the place. I thought "I can't move well enough to kill it, shall I ask for help?" Then I thought "Nah" and just went and sat in my doorway with the door open. After 3 or 4 minutes I thought "Nah, he's still indoors" and reached out to close the door and give up. And the fly then flew over me and back outside.

Ready and Waiting

In less than 45 minutes my taxi is arriving - to take me to the dentist

(moan) So my taxi came, went to Pond St, there a woman said "No dentist now, they have gone out", so I came back without my teeth being fixed

L8R

Then later Freya came to visit me. Which sort of did my head in after such an eventful morning. I cooked for her as a treat, and she was very beautiful

Mornin'

Wow. Well this morning I had to go to the Priory Day Hospital for me assessment re physiotherapy. And it felt REALLY GOOD. AND I got a really nice free lunch. And I now have physio twice a week, starting Friday. In future I will go by Taxi and get an ambulance lift back.

THEN we went to the shop. Bought stuff for the garden etc, got in the car and came back. Then she said "Where's your stuff?". So I had to wait here while she went back, and luckily found the trolley with our stuff in it still sitting in the car park

ETR

So last night I reset my alarm clock as I need to be up etc this morning. I woke up, thought "Nah", went back to sleep for an hour and still got up 3/4 of an hour b4 my alarm rang

Gardening

And I asked for some help planting the Poppy Seeds that my Mum sent over ages ago

Walkies

Today I went to the shop by myself. When I was there I did some of my shopping as normal and for part of the time I stood up and walked

And the taxi today 'cost loads more than usual, he said "Yes, time and a half, it's a bank holiday"

Dead Creature

Last night there was a Stick Insect buzzing around the place, in here, doing my head in, and there is no way I could catch it. Then this morning as I was getting brekky I noticed a dead Stick Insect on the kitchen floor

Singin'

Good lord, tonight I was lookin' through some more of my old stuff and I found a copy of a song that I used to sing while I was busking. But gosh, my whole heart sings, it is a really good song that I had forgotten. What they said!!!

Fragrant

Then I obeyed and had a shower this afternoon

But I forgot to put on my antiperspirant, so perhaps not so fragrant

AND

My PC started misbehaving with my "message rules". Instead of asking for help I waited, thought about it some more changed summat, saw the result, changed it further and therefore fixed it all by myself

Lord, lumme

Well after yesterday and the day before's excitement today feels a bit..... relaxing I s'pose.

Or it might be seen as dull, I am not sure

More business

And Julia came back over tonight. I felt a bit strange being polite but perhaps that is what the future may hold. Anyway she came with her brother who has turned his life right around in the past seven years

Toby

And Toby came here. We talked a lot of sense, a lot more than we would normally talk, and further made friends again. I love him and he loves me

And he is temporarily moving away

Julia phoned

I looked at my phone, thought "Mmmm" but answered anyway. First of all Julia asked if she and her brother, Robert, can come over tonight, I said "Yes please", then she said I have to do some shopping later, can I drop Toby off with you so you can see him before he goes to Julies, I shouted "YES" to that, so I am no awaiting.....

Weekend

Well, it is now Saturday, which is different from every other day how?? Now I am trying to get my head round the meeting yesterday but........

Jasus

Well I had a Care Review meeting today. First of all I went out with my Dad and sister shopping (to distract me) then all kinds of important people came to see me. All in all I think it went well, I was polite, they talked as if I mattered etc. First thing on my printed out agenda was just "Toby" and his social worker talked. Afterwards I said that I felt the need to crawl across the floor and kiss her feet. She arranged that when Toby comes back he will come and see me first, before "going home" which is why I nearly cried. After that the rest of the meeting felt really light and easy, I agreed to do more "getting better" stuff generally. But my son is so important and he loves me more than anyone

Morning

So to distract me my Dad and sister took me out this morning, we went shopping and got more shelves for the cupboard and a charger to plug in my lights. Here we are back, they are busy putting stuff together and I am getting in a fuss over this meeting later

No I'm not scared....

OK, I am, just a bit. Loadsa folk are coming here for my Care Review tomorrow, I can't say "I have no need for care" because then they will say "Well we don't need to pay you then".....

Dad and Sis

Then this evening my Dad and big Sister arrived. They are staying here tomorrow for my Care Review so..........

Morning

This morning I have been waiting for the wheelchair fixer man and awaiting this evenings visit from my sister and my dad

Dull

After such an exciting morning I have had nowt to do this afternoon. Tra la la. So being bored I made a couple of important to me web-pages, the first talking about writing the date and then one on a Mini that I had never seen before

Alone

And this morning I managed this "shopping alone" thing again, taxi into town, haircut, shopping in Aardvark, shopping in the market for an adapter then came home. All by myself!!!

And gosh but the women in Aardvark were very helpful as I couldn't carry my basket and walk at the same time, and I had to leave my 'chair in the street outside

Freya

And then this afternoon Freya came in for a visit. She had a strange visit, she was pleased to be here but while she was here I read some more from my pile of stuff, some of which were notes from Freya's mum saying how she would love me forever etc

And I have finished now, I no longer have anything from the past sitting on my desk or the seat next to it

Wow

So this morning I asked when the wheel-chair fixer was coming, they asked and said "Any time today" so I thought "No, can't wait, got to shop and be back before Freya comes". So..... so I phoned a taxi and took myself, by myself, to the supermarket. Then, after I came back the wheelchair fixer came here and tightened my brakes. But it was the first time in over 7 years I have been trusted to shop alone. I thought "No, not Tesco as it is too big" but I went to Morrison's instead and could cope

Book

Good lord. Well I have just started reading the first bbook I have read in over 7 years. It is hard work, there seems to be a lack of continuity between the end of 1 line and the beginning of the next, but I can just about manage. And it has gotta be said, the Introduction to the current edition of The Colour Purple is fu*king excellent. I have read some more, her letters to god and I am impressed. And she seems to be a heathen so far so I am relaxed too

Blinkin' Flip

So this afternoon I asked a MOS to help me with sorting out some paperwork that was piled up on the chair. Firstly I was able to throw away some shit from the court 12 years ago. Then I was able to put together some "stuff to be kept". THEN I started looking through "Neil's blue book of stuff". And "Wow". It is very good, contains poems by me, Julia, both of us, other people and loads of "my thoughts" from way back then. Just "Wow" again.I tried scanning it, most of which looked shit but one worked, at last

And a few more now...

Fixer

And someone came to see me this morning with a note saying "Wheelchair fixer off sick, another person is coming tomorrow" so......

Just to make you happy

Look at this

Curious

I was outside tonight, in the first cool air that I have felt today, and there was a chap who came to see someone across the road, with him he had a strange four footed walking stick. Now I dunno how it feels different but perhaps I could use one with my right hand?

Thrill....

Mmmm....