Fear

But I am a bit scared about tomorrow....

Toby

And Julie is bringing that handsome Toby chap to see me tomorrow, so a)my parents are pleased to see Toby, and b)they are going to take us all out for dinner, hopefully

Dentist

So I was able to phone the Taxi that I had booked to the dentist 20 mins before it was due to come here as my parents had arrived. Once we found the flipping dentist I went in, she just did one filling today but next time I think I will be able to handle 2. My next appointment isn't for a month, but hopefully by then all this other stuff re my claim will be done and dusted

But why are my parents here..... because I am being assessed tomorrow!!

And it seem at last as if my lips are back to normal, and there is no pain. So "Hooray"

...Healthy, Wealthy and Wise

So I woke up and got up at 7.30 s'morning. Loads on today. Dentist and my parents coming to see me too

Parental

And I have just spoken to my Dad and he said that both my parents should be here tomorrow because of the important person coming to see me on Friday. But un~flipping~fortunately I will probably be at the dentist when they get here

Mouse

And today, for the first time in 7½ years I was using my mouse in my right hand, like I used to. It flipping hurt etc but a little practice each day

PDH

Aargh, off to the PDH in a bit, I hope it is as effective as a very effective thing

Gosh and yes it was and I had to come back early instead of waiting for hours like usual

And I realized when walking there that I needed to shorten my walking stick by one button, suddenly it is much easier to walk more properly without it sticking out miles

Alarm clock

So this morning when my alarm clock went off (Yes, I was already up and awake) I opened the lid of my mobile phone/alarm clock was about to press the "off" button when I realized that my alarm clock had stopped. Puzzled I just tried putting it away again. And as predicted by me in 10 minutes it went off again, this time I pressed the "Stop" button

Gosh

And I was so exhausted last night that I went to bed about 10.30 so I woke up and got up this morning 45 minutes before my alarm clock went off

Scared

So tomorrow I am going to the Day Hospital again for my Physio and again I am leaving my wheelchair here, walking and getting in my taxi etc etc

Quarter to four

So as I am actually gonne chop stuff up etc, properly cook, I am gonna have my wheelchair back now

Crisis

So just now I went into the kitchen to prepare some lunch. I turned on the tap to wash my cup first and nothing happened. I tried the hot tap again nothing. So I called a Member Of Staff. He said "Yes, I have just been on the phone to Welsh Water and apparently there was a burst pipe in Johnstown, they are trying to fix it ATM"

So no-one local to here has a tap that works

Higher up

And I was trying to type with my right hand (too) today and I thought it was much to far up to reach with my "not working properly" arm. So I stood up and managed to find the handle that I didn't know was on my chair and it is much better and easier now

Freya

And usually on a Tuesday I would have a visit from that beautiful Freya but this week, as she's away on Dance Camp

Walk

Well today I have been walking everywhere since I got up this morning, so lets see how long it continues, will I be able to do as much as Sunday?

Right hand sweep

Well, yesterday I thought "The floor needs sweeping" but as I was walking everywhere I couldn't manage it. Today I am in a wheelchair so I swept the floor. Then I got the little dustpan and brush which is usually a struggle to use, with the dust pan balanced on one foot etc. BUT today I swept with my right hand for the first time in 7¼ years. It wasn't fully effective but I managed, I did it!!

Shop

Well I got a Taxi to (More reason to shop at) Morrisons, got everything I need, had a bit of a look around and chose another soup to try too.

While I was shopping I looked around more and thought "Wow, better try that" because I have found grating or slicing cheese to be a big hassle. The only issue I have is after opening eat within 3 days but I will make a couple of pizza's and sandwhiches, as long as they are close together

Not walking

So as I walked everywhere yesterday, as I am a bit knackered, and I have to take my 'chair to the shop s'morning I just figures out "Lets walk tomorrow"

Sound

I had to reinstall Winamp video tonight that was fine, now I can see video's again. But it wouldn't play music, so I couldn't put it on and go to bed. It said that my sound card was f*cked. I tried for about half an hour then had to ask for help. He tried for about 15 minutes then gave up and tried "unupdating" which took about 10 minutes then my sound was coming again, hoo flipping ray

But then I had to install "watching video" again.

Aargh

Feck

Well, it's now after 10 o'clock and I have succeeded in making it redundant

Tired

Amd when I am walking 5 or 6 hrs more than I managed in the past walking is just hard, end of. It's very hard now

Big walkies

Well it's now half way between dinner time and bed time and I am still walking everywhere, I haven't been on my wheelchair all day

YES

And for the first time in over 7 years I have stood up and cooked all my meals today. AND THEN I did my washing up, still standing. It did feel hard but I managed. So now I am sitting in my PC seat once again, wondering if I will be able to walk everywhere tonight too, and therefore make my wheelchair redundant?

Sunday Walk

So I have been walking everywhere since I got up this morning and it is about the time when I used to stop. (???) Yes, it is now harder to walk than it was this morning but today I am gonna try to make my evening meal from an upstanding position to practice. if I suck seeds it will be the first evening meal that I am still walking for in 7¼ years. In a bit I will have to start cooking.....

I think 4PM is as late as I have managed to walk, that's in 10 minutes and I am not gonna stop today

AND I DID IT!!!

Sunday Blo*dy Sunday

So what should one do on a Sunday?? As I am not one of these "Go to church and pray" types what shall I do, as I am stuck here
At least I am stuck here walking everywhere today but.....

Walking

Well I woke up and got up at 7.15 this morning and walked from my bedroom into the kitchen first thing.......

And after walking today it seems that my left leg has remembered this "walking properly" routine, moving forward as far as my other leg

But it seems to have forgotten some if I try to walk with no walking stick, it is a much shorter pace, or a much more wobbly scary one if I am concentrating, if I use my walking stick it remembers again

Walking

And I didn't do much walking today, I think I was a bit weary from yesterdays great event and I was going out early. But when I got there I didn't need my wheelchair, I parked it up, sat in it, but didn't move it away from there, I was walking to the kitchen and loo etc

Still

Still up, I don't have to get up in't morning....

Well I woke up at 7.45 s'morning and got up at 10 to 8

And this afternoon Alex is coming over to take me to his boys party. There might be other attenders that I know (inc Julia!!!)....

Good lord, there were all kinds of people, Julia and her new chap and their kid, Julie and that Toby chap etc, just WOW it was good. And we had a lovely meal and Alex brought me back here later, much later

And I wish I had been brave enough to take loads more photos

'Stick

And now this walking properly seems harder than walking improperly, so I more need to use my walking stick. But this is only the first day, I expect (and hope) that it will get easier as I practice more

Gosh

And I feel really knackered now, what I did wasn't a great deal of exercise but this 'walking properly' seems to have worn me out

Sh*t

And when I opened my door this morning sitting on my step was my new T shirt

Off

To Priory Day Hospital in a bit for Physiotherapy

And good lord, today's Physio session has made my normal walking pattern change.

Permanently. To say that I am a bit pleased is an understatement

Stuck

So at 11.15AM today I thought "Nah, too hard" and went and got my walking stick (not my chair) from the bedroom

I won't use it much but it helps with my fear

And since I went and got it it has been sitting leaning against the settee, out of reach but it makes my fear more manageable

And I didn't use it again this time but I didn't sit in my wheelchair until 15.30PM

Up

8.45 this morning, neither late or early..... Nowt on today but I might have a lift to a Folk Club tonight

And yes, apparently I do......

And Ruth just txtd me, she is going out to play too. C her later

And she did even tho it was too busy to speak to her etc I managed to return the thingy off my cupboard door

Drink

And I had 2 cans of beer tonight, earlier but by god I want the 3rd and 4th and 5th etc tins now but as I am outa practice I won't have them tonight

Tomorrow

So today since I got back I have been in my wheelchair but tomorrow I will be walking into make breakfast and see how it goes from there

Wonky toes

And if you look at the picture of me walking bare foot you can see how the toes on my right foot are all wrinkled, curled up

Alex

And Alex, my ex neighbor who works over the road txted me today with an invite to his house on Saturday as his son will be 16!! I have said "Yes" but we will have to make arrangements

Off in a bit

I am off in a bit to Physiotherapy at PDH

And WOW today I walked up and down with bare feet, no splint on or extra sole

THIS IS IMPORTANT!!!

HHGTTG

I finished the first book I have read in 7 years tonight

Visitor

And that Sam fella phoned me and he is coming here later this afternoon

Good lord, yes he came here and pissed about. Again I feel that I am meeting him for the first time...

Broken

I went to make myself a pot of coffee and my coffee maker fell apart. I thought "Sh*t" but with some exploration I was able to put it back together while standing in the kitchen!!

AM

9.15 this morning, a proper lie in

Check

And I have just spoken to Freya and I was correct, she said she was coming a day early this week (today) as she is going to a camp tomorrow.

Camp ~ but good lord, she must be beginning to get a life of her own as a grownup..... I think I met Julia on a camp originally

Gosh, Freya was here, we had quality time again, I am restarting to make friends

Shop

So in a bit I am off to (More Reason To Shop At) Morrisons to get my weeks shopping, I have written a list and put it in my pocket

And not on the list was "soup" but I bought a can anyway on impulse but good lord, I can't recall eating any soup in the years since my accident, but it was delicious today

Less lie in

Awww 7.00 this morning......

4pm

And I didn't sit in my wheelchair until after 4 o'clock this afternoon, so all day I have been walking with no stick

Dead

And I only found out today that Kirsty MacColl died a terribly accidental death in 2000

And...

And I heard a concept on the radio today that I was unaware of. Can someone tell me more about them?

Fsck it

So every time I stand up and walk I am thinking "Shit, it's too hard." but fsck it, I don't need to do it, I can be a cripple forever. Or I can continue this relearning process until it becomes easier

No, no, no

They tried to make me go to Rehab, but I said "No, no, no"

Right hand

And I am using my right hand to help me type today and it is working. QWERTY are left handed and UIOP etc are my right hand and it isn't a great deal slower, but it still f**king hurts

Lie In

In order to stay asleep tomorrow morning and therefore have a lie in I am staying up later than usual tonight

And hoo~f*c*ing~ray I woke up earlier this morning but was able to go back to sleep and I didn't wake up until 8.20 ~ a lie in

Bed

And today I succeeded in changing my bed by myself. It was the first time in more than 7 years I have succeeded in changing my quilt cover. The first time, obviously I am getting better. And better and better......

Stickless

"without my stick" is a bit important. More than a bit, it's very important

2pm

So today I abandoned my walk everywhere at 2pm. It is the most I have walked without my stick by a factor of 20 or 30 or more

Walkies

Well I got up this morning and walked into the kitchen, made breakfast, pushed the trolley to the table, walked from there when I had finished sat down in my 'puter chair and now looking at my PC. Wheelchairs, who needs 'em?

So I walked into my bedroom, looked at my box of washing, thought, sat myself down in my wheelchair, carried my washing to the machine, put it on, then returned myself and the wheelchair to my bedroom, parked it and walked back out

AND more to the point everywhere that I am walking this morning I am doing it without my 'stick

Sigh

7.15 s'morning.....

I don't think I will get a taxi to Waverley Stores today, all that is on my shopping list in veg which at a guess I will look for in Morrisons when I go there on Monday

Dinner

And tonight I made myself a small dinner as I had so much lunch

Mender

Then this afternoon someone came to service my boiler. He had to do much strange computerized boiler servicing, never even saw a pair of pliers

Well

So I woke up early but not as early, so...... anyway I received a bill for £100 for my basket which I have had to send to my sister as she is gonna apply for funding....

Today I am off the PDH again, and I want to say that I am so pleased holding hands but it hurts and makes me better which is a bit distracting.....

Gosh, well it went really well with my exercises etc. But today, for the first time, I used my 'stick outside, got through the door and picked my stick up off the ground, and kept it there for my whole visit. Walking sticks who needs 'em?

Wow

And tonight I thought "What shall I read?" looked at all my books thought "Nah" thought "No" then I found a copy of The Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy, and wow I am so impressed that I have read 48 pages so far with more to come tonight etc. It is the first book that I have got into for 7½ years, I am enjoying reading again, and I am capable of too

Grating

So for dinner tonight I made a Pizza again, with onion and mushroom. But when I made it tonight I simply grated the cheese, which I couldn't manage 2 or 3 pizza's ago. So I now have a spare utensil, my grating device, that I no longer need

Dull Thursday....

So here I am.... sitting here...

Tra-la-la

Thursday

Nowt on today, nowt to do, woke up very early this morning, I must stay up a bit later in order to sleep later in the morning.....

Microwave

Then I reheated the rest of the curry in the microwave for dinner. I remembered what the woman who explained it again had said and it was actually easy to use tonight, easier than it has been in the past.

While that was 'doing' I looked in the locked drawer for summat else and found the instructions to my watch. I had thought these were lost so I had got a downloaded set of instructions which were not helping me, but tonight after reading the printed instructions I was able to switch off my alarm which has been going off every day for a week and switch off the dull beep every hour function

Up

Ho hum, I got up about 7 am this morning, I got bored with waking up earlier and going back to sleep. So I am off to PDH in a bit, without my wheelchair

Phew, I have done it all and come back now. First of all we worked on my arm, gosh it hurt but double gosh it made me arm much (not an exaggeration!!) better although now I am a bit puzzled what she had to do but anyway I can nearly straighten my wrist while my fingers are extended, so much better than last week

And they said "In 2 weeks time when you said you couldn't make it come here early and one on the staff will take you across then they will bring you back here later, it is just 'there'"

AND they said that they have booked me in for a Chiropodist but dunno when that is gonna come together. So the infection in my toe should be cured in the end

Her mum

(Scary)Then Freya's mum came to pick her up, we were talking about how ill I had been ages ago. She told me that when I first came out of my coma I couldn't speak for a while.(/Scary)

With Freya

And Freya came over to see me, it felt as if she was relaxing, not a 'special visit' any more, just her at mine. And she is staying for ages, 'til after her bedtime 7 years ago

Cut

And I found a new volunteer who cuts his own hair and he agreed to try and cut my hair. In the end after much begging he cut the other side too

Tuesday morning

So I woke up this morning at about 7.05 I lay there thinking "Awww" in the end at about 8 AM I got up, for breakfast etc. I have nowt to do today except book Taxis for tomorrow and Friday to go to the Day Hospital

Which I have done now, booked

Good lord, my visitor today, I forgot to mention it

Rain

And it has been raining all night, it wasn't raining when I got back earlier but it is raining now

Back

And then I went back into Carmarthen, bought a bowl to wash my feet in and looked and looked everywhere for a new purse but I couldn't find one that matches my requirements, I suspect I will get one in the market which was all closed by the time I made it today

Shopping

Well, I got up etc, in a bit I am off to buy my weeks food (apart from the veg, I get them on a Saturday)...

Did it, got it all except for a new washing up bowl which they didn't sell, but everything else was bought. I seem to be getting better at looking at the whole shelf rather than just choosing the first thing I see

My Toe

So the MOS that's qualified came to cut my toe nail today, the one I can't manage. She looked at my foot and said "Euch, there is an infection there, see a chiropractor" so I will have to ask on Wednesday when I am in the Day Hospital.

Hoo flippin' ray

....and Ixion has come back on after being off for about 40 hrs

Nervous

So today I have been wheelchairing everywhere as last week I walked miles without my 'stick which I want to do again, so everywhere in my house should be reachable but I am a smidge nervous

Sunday

Ho hum. It's Sunday morning, got up, had breakfast etc. Tomorrow morning I am going to the supermarket but today...... NOWT!!!

Stickless

And I went down to the walkable bit outside, stood up and walked off with my stick in my right hand not touching the ground. I only went about 10 m but I turned around, still with no stick, and walked back to my chair stickless. It was the first time I was doing it outside

Grating

So tonight I am making a pizza for dinner, in the kitchen I took out a big bit of cheese and went to the cupboard for my complex grating machine. I looked into the cupboard and took out a plain grater instead. I was a bit scared but it proved well possible to use. So obviously summat is better than before and the washing up pile is a lot smaller

S'morning

This morning because I am going into town I am in my wheelchair but also, I think, now if I am walking Wednesday and Friday then I'd better give my legs a chance to recover so Thursday and Saturday are now wheelchair all day days, as I need to reciover/rest afterwards etc

Gosh

Well, it's Saturday morning so in a bit I will book a Taxi to go to Waverley Stores to buy some organic veg etc

Repeat prescription

So today a nice lady from Boots came over and delivered my Asthma medication to my front door. I am a bit impressed, I have never used a 'deliver my repeat prescription' service before but this was WAY impressive

PDH

So I am off to Day Hospital in a bit for my Physio but today she said she is gonna start working on my right arm as well as my legs

Blinkin' flip, but wow generally. It hurt but worked again etc. So she said "Your hand" took it in hers(1) and painfully stretched it out for 4 minutes etc. THEN we did my usual exercises etc

(1) I had to tell her that I have been dreaming about holding her hand for ages but I was distracted by this "getting better" thing that I was doing

Folky?

So here I am, nowt on today. There is a folk club tonight in Llansaint which is generally very good but it is too far away to pay a taxi, but I might be able to get a lift..... wait and see now

AND while I was there there was no folky intermission.

Yes, I spent £700.00 or so each way in a taxi to find a normal, almost empty pub, not a Folk Club

Welsh summer holidays

And indeed it is gonna be school summer holidays next week so it is raining so hard ATM

Free

Then today after I was at the Day Hospital for lunch someone came round later and said "They have loadsa food across the way, want a veggie selection?" and then brought me a free dinner, loadsa salad, Samosa's etc

Bruv

Then half an hour later my older brother came up to see me. He is only from Belfast 'til tomorrow morning so not a long visit. BUT amongst the stuff he handed me a new guitar, which is a bit posh, I had a half a play today and it seems really nice

Back

So I am back this morning at PDH, I missed last Fridays because they were having a review of me....

And gosh but they remembered me, it was very hard and exhausting but I have done it before - so keep it up.

They also said this time that on Friday a) they will have me walking towards a mirror in order to see my problems and b) they will start work on my right arm which I want to shout about etc

Freya

And tonight's visitor came, it was a bit..... but...

Scared

Well, I am slightly too scared to talk about what's going on in my head but........

Fear, OK, if I am this sick now, sicker than most people ever feel, how ill must I have been 7.5 years ago

Well...

So here I am again....... too much to talk about out....

Well

Some of my kids and their Granny and Grandpa came to visit me today

Aargh

Gosh, yesterday before the car broke down we were looking at were I useda live, with no memory (much) but......

Double Gosh

And we went to go out for dinner but they have a puncture. The company said "See you in a bit" but didn't show up. Now we are awaiting the next tyre fixer and the Pizza Deliverer man to bring us dinner.

(Sigh)

Gosh

Well today I have been putting up with my dad and sister all day...... but..... Then this afternoon some people came along for my review meeting and it was surprising how positive about me they were, but they were. No calm down Neil, walk before running etc etc

I can

So I can open it I bragged. I can, but it's the place with the cross wire stopper. But, I found out when I asked them yesterday, I am allowed in, it's there for another reason.

(Tap, tap, tap)

Waiting for my Dad and my Sister....

Gosh they turned up and it was....

But now they have gone away 'til tomorrow...

Well...

Yes, I am here again.....

PDH

I'm off to the PDH today...

And it went well, lots and lots of exercises which hurt less than last week!!

And good lord, I don't feel tired as such but everything suddenly seems like it's way too much hassle or too difficult so perhaps I am a bit weary...